WAI:Having it, eating it and choking on it!

So hands up if your mum used to say to you well you can't have your cake and eat it?!! Well mine did, and I think I can safely say that it took a good while to understand quite what she meant. So in my mind just so we are clear it means if you eat your cake you won't have it! So I  I have been known to spout off that you can have your cake and eat it but you may end up choking on it! So here I find myself, trying not to choke on my cake! This is the thing, you know how much I love my zumba and how much I love  my slimming world class on a Monday! Now I have to say my intentions were always pure, I wanted to improve my my weight losses, I already went to zumba on Weds evenings  and I wanted to add another which happened to be on a Monday the same day as my SW class in fact it was at the same time! So I started coming to the earlier  class, but this was to prove more and more difficult, as getting away from work early enough, was hard, and the trains are so unreliable, but still i persevered, practically and logically,  it was clear that i was really supposed to choose between the two: zumba or SW, but that was impossible, I love both equally, they both have a related but distinctly different role in my life. So against the odds, week after week, so i trudged, and tried to get away from from work on time,  having my cake and eating it so to speak. 

 More often than not the trains would disappoint, and my weight losses were not great, 1lb here 2 lb there! 3 off 2 on it all got a bit much, making sensible choices while out then became a chore, I could feel myself like a two year old throwing that tantrum, rolling around on the floor screaming, but I want that cake, it's not fair! ( no I'm not mad, this is a virtual tantrum- one in my head) and more often than not, I'd have the cake! 

So here we are 2 weeks before Xmas, and I've not been able to get to class for two weeks in a row now, not good, because more than anything now is when I need the tips for staying in control over Xmas, the best place in the world apart from zumba where you are not judged!  I remember thinking one day what it takes to be really good at SW, there's this lady in our class who is at target and she mentioned that she had given up baking which she is actually quite good at! I like baking and I bake all sorts of things with scan bran but every now and again I want the real deal and then I get a penchant for it and I don't know when to stop! 

On and on it goes, so in the end indiscipline has gotten the better of me! I have choked on the proverbial cake!  Because of this desire to do both one definitely has suffered a bit, to be brutally honest, it is SW ( or rather my ability to attend and reap all the benefits of it) has suffered! Now here's the thing, I have benefited greatly from the increased exercise, my clothes fit better, in some areas they are even too big,  I feel better, fitter, so what is a girl to do! 

What I am going to say though is that my behaviour around cakes, chocolate and other pieces of Devils food, has gone awry to say the least, and this is where not attending SW properly has had the biggest impact! The coping strategy tips we share are priceless and for me reading those things on a blog ( ha ha) or in a magazine just don't do it for me, there is nothing better than seeing someone tell you this or tell you that, especially when you are seeing their progress too! My desire to bake cakes has returned with a bang, not good, did I say that already I think that is definitely worth a repeat! 

So what is a girl to do? The other repercussion of my antics is that I actually miss my SW consultant because she is warm and funny, I like her real and pragmatic attitude, I feel like I have been separated by force from a friend I miss my fellow Slimming word peeps. So yes that's there. I need to get my attitude in check and make it match my desire to shed  the pounds! 

I remember a few months ago a friend of mine said that I should consider that this is how I am supposed to be! I dismissed that as a negative attitude... What I have come to know is that life is not a race, despite there only being a finite time on this earth, some of us do have to take the scenic route, sometimes more than once! On this note I can say for sure, that I will be back at SW very soon, as soon as I have stopped gagging on the cake!!!!!!!!!